REVIEWS

 Lynn's Thoughts, Reviews, and Uses

Books:

Taking the High Road by Nailah Shami

For the challenging divorce where it feels like a "life sentence". This book will shift that if you really do the work. It was the first book that got me moving in a positive direction.

Difficult Conversations by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton and Sheila Heen

Everybody should read this book- going through a divorce or not. It's also the book to read if you are considering separation. You will learn very good skills from it that will help you wade through all the difficult conversations

Tug of War: A Judge's Verdict on Separation, Custody Battles, and the Bitter Realities of Family Court by Justice Harvey Brownstone

Brownstone, a well seasoned family court judge, goes over all the reasons to work as hard as you possibly can to stay OUT of court. But, he also acknowledges that sometimes you do NEED the court system involved and how to navigate through it.

Does Wednesday Mean Mom's or Dad's House by Marc J. Ackerman

A great book to help your children as your family transitions to a two home family. Great tips and insight.

Children Come First by Howard H. Irving, Ph. D.

Keeping the best interest of the children in mind, Irving gives insight on how to keep this your focus.

The Healthy Divorce. By. Lois Gold, M.S.W.

Keeping it as healthy as possible should be the goal for every divorce, even with the inevitable challenges. For those couples who can both keep the focus on an amicable family transition, this book is very helpful on guiding you through it.

Uncoupling:  Turning Points in Intimate Relationships  by Diane Vaughan

For anyone and everyone going through a separation and divorce, Diane Vaughan is brilliant at explaining the possible emotional processes. It will give insight into what you are going through and into what your partner is going through. Knowing where each of you are at and experiencing will only better help with decision making.

Splitting: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Some with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder by Bill Eddy, LCSW and Randi Krege

I cannot express how important this book is for anyone going through a separation from someone with a challenging personality!!!! Read it and then READ IT AGAIN!!!!! And then, every few years, READ IT AGAIN!!!! This book along with Taking the High Road (first up there in my list) got me to the happy place I am today, along with my understanding the skills I needed to make sure my children found their happiness too.

Great Country Walks Around Toronto by Elliott Katz

I have been using this book for years to guide me to Nature Toronto.  I could never be able to count the hours and memories I have had from following the urban trails laid out in this tiny gem of a book.

Another way to find trails, parks, nature adventures in your area is to pull out a map of your neighbourhood and area within 45 minutes in all directions.  Look for the green spaces, then zoom in to see if there are trails.  Google the name of the trail to find out entrances, directions, etc.  Pack up a snack and a reusable water bottle, plus the right clothing for that weather and completely enjoy your nature time.

Last Child in the Woods: Saving Our Children From Nature Defecit Disorder

by Richard Louv

I was introduced to this book on a podcast with David Suzuki, Naturalist and Conservationist.  It is one of my top 10 books of all time!!!!  I so strongly believe that everyone should read it in order to understand what we need as human beings, as animals of this planet.  It is also a guide on how to give your children the gift of nature, the gift of well-being.  

The Dance of Anger: A Woman's Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships    by Harriet Lerner

My introduction to this book was via my Family Mediation mentor, Joyce Young, a very wise woman (now a retired mediator).  It is a book that has stood up the test of time and continues to help many to understand and shift unhealthy relationships.  Why read it if you are divorced from them?

1.  If you have children - there will always be some sort of interaction and wouldn’t it be nice if you felt more empowered when those moments occur?

2.  Better understanding ourselves and how we interact and respond with others will only improve all our relationships, not just romantic, but with friends, family, children and colleagues.

The Power of Kindness: Why Empathy Is Essential in Everyday Life by

Dr. Brian Goldman

I am quite interested in the science behind HOW the human brain works and HOW to use shift our thinking into more positive outlooks.  Dr Brian Goldman has done a beautiful job on introducing us to how powerful kindness and empathy to others is in leading us to a more joyful life.  It’s easy and free to implement once you understand the  path.  
 

Products:

 

Twinkly Lights

A very quick and easy way to make a huge change to your home with very little cost output- make any room magical, warm and cozy

GABA

I like the chewable type; used to "calm me down" when tension got high. Check with doctor if taking other medications

Essential Oil Diffuser

I use this every single day to add the smells of essential oils to my home. I walk in the front door to the oils diffused throughout the house to calm me , invigorate me, to let me know that my home is my sanctuary.

 

Essential Oils

I choose the ones that smelled good to me , along with researching which ones calm and relax, and others that are uplifting. This variety pack helps to find which ones you prefer.

Walking Stick

Depending on how steady you feel on uneven paths, bringing a Walking Stick along can make you feel more confident on taking on the unbeaten paths.

 

Walking Poles

Bump up that time outdoors with Walking Poles.  I don’t use them myself as I like to “stroll”, but I have crossed paths with many who do use them and they have all told me they LOVE THEM!!!!

 

Rubber Boots

My absolute favourite days are ones that call for wearing rain boots.  It takes me right back to the wonderment of childhood.  I never miss a good puddle, nor am nervous about getting dirty when sloshing through mud on those rainy days, or the day after when it’s still quite mucky out there.

 

Rain Coat

Rain does not stop me; actually those are some of the days out.  Even on sunny days I bring along a easily packable raincoat or rain poncho just in case there is a thunderstorm.  Be prepared.

Breathable Hat

Not much more to say other than always have a hat with you: protection from sun and rain.  Of course in winter, warm is essential.

Rain Pants

As I love a day wear rain boots are needed, I am just on happy on days that I get to pull out my rain pants.  Don’t tuck them into your boots- wear them over the boots to keep the rain out of your shoes.  Rainy, muddy, mucky- with this kind of gear you can enjoy all of it.  I always keep a few old towels in my car so I can clean up before heading home:)
 

Crampons

I truly do not know how anyone gets through icy winters without these.  I have many pairs, ones in the house, ones in my car.  Make sure to get ones that fit over your boots well, then no need to stay indoors on those horribly icy days.  I feel so confident getting out there into the woods when I have my crampons on.  I don’t fear slipping or falling.  I’m always wear them if there is a light snowfall with ice underneath.  I honestly feel so powerful when I’m out there enjoying winter with all the right gear to be warm and safe.
 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

© 2018 by Lynn Kaplan, Certified Divorce Doula